Loads of it

Just and Update, I have been getting more letters which of course make me happy. He sounds exactly the same so the Marines hasn't changed him too much, although he seems a lot more serious about life in general. Oh and I cannot get enough of meeting new people (girlies) with Marine boyfriends, or military bf's in general, which I've been meeting a ton of them and they are amazing. Thanks girls!

Today 

So yesterday I got a call that I have been dreading. I might sound dramatic to some but hear me out, here's the story. Before Timothy left to boot camp, we decided to do things to enjoy our last days together, one of those things was to go and make our own pottery! This is something I have been dying to do and was so excited to do it. The closest place that we found was in Connecticut, which I didn't mind at all because I would give up my bald headed bird to live in CT (omg just kidding). So the day before we were all scheduled to go to the private pottery lesson, they called and said they had to cancel and if they could reschedule it for next week. Timothy briefly explained that he couldn't next week because he would have already left for Marines boot camp. The conversation quickly ended, and we were both pretty upset, especially because the horseback riding trail ride that we had scheduled for the same day had also canceled on us. Within about 5 minutes we get a call back from the pottery place and they told us there's no way they could turn down a Marine, especially because the owner comes from a Marines family. We were so happy and surprised. The class was amazing, we had a private lesson with the owner herself and literally made bowls out of big chunks of clay, water and a spinning wheel. 

There's Timothy working very hard 

Here's the outcome

For our first time I think it came out pretty good 

Okay, so in order to give it amazing color and a nice glazed look to it, the owner told me she'd call me back in about two weeks so that I can go pick it up. Timothy of course would be in boot camp, so I'd have to go all by myself and go get them, which to me was very depressing and as much as I wanted to see the bowls, I was not looking forward to that. So I brought along an amazing friend of mine, and went. Thank God for friends, I don't know how in the world i would have felt if I had to go alone. Am i being dramatic? 

So because we were already there I figured I should take my friend to Crumbs cupcake bakery (Timothy and I went the day that we did the pottery, and he loves it). I love this place, There's one in the city and a few in CT, 

so I had to go. 

Milkshake cupcake 

On a last note, I have been feeling very, very, very down lately. The more days that pass the harder it gets. But I have no choice but to suck it up and deal. One thing that has been making me strangely happy is this song, it from Brazil, and it has a cutesy dance to it that I think everyone should try to find on YouTube and learn it, it's fun! My sister and I have been learning it and the words, and since we are Spanish we can understand most of it, if you cant, definitively look up the meaning it helps make the dance a whole lot spicier.  :) The girls from Brazil cannot get enough of it, you'll see what I mean.

Michel Telo- Ai Se Eu Te Pego

Feel Lovely, 

Stephanie

Hello there love

So we are in contact :) I got letters from him and I feel soooo happy. I've gotten five envelopes and a piece of his belt which was a sweet touch. The letters helped a lot but they break my heart because even in his last letter he has yet to get any of my letters to him and he was really saddened by it, I could tell. I'm sending letter like cray I think I'm on my 7th one about to write and send the 8th. I just always want his name to be called at mail call. I've been adding puzzles and mazes and word searches in his letters lol I hope that helps him. I read all of his letters to me almost every day memorizing each word, it's all I have of him right now. Then I lay them all out and stare at it completely floored by the fact that we're actually doing this that we actually together made this decision, it's hard it I know it will be worth it

Trying to stay lovely, Stephanie

Support

WARNING: if you don't want to hear me go on and on about how going through this is hard please feel free to stop reading lol,it's okay no hard feelins. But if you don't mind, well thank you darling! Okay so I started doing this blog in order to get all of my feelings out there and in order to have him be able to come and look at all of this when he comes back. Also I really wanted to be able to connect with others going through whatim going through. Which is hard because not many people are and not many people talk,I get tons of views but no convo, it's okay though. so I also looked for another site that was more specific and had a lot more conversation in it. Which is what i need, to talk to others who have gone through it with their boyfriends or are still going through it. I found this amazing place where I've already Come in contact with a handful of people who are very willing to talk to me and are also recently going through their boyfriend being in bootcamp. If you need that extra support from people who understand take a look: You can talk to me on there too! http://marinefamilynetwork.com/profile/STEPHANIEANNERS

Be lovely, Stephanie

Oh Mr. Sun

I'm blogging like crazy! Sorry! I just have so many thoughts, too many thoughts. 

I cannot wait any longer for Summer to hurry up and get here. I'm dying to get a bathing suit on, sun bathe, jump in some pools, and swim in a few oceans. Am I the only one? Even though I'll be enjoying most of the Summer alone, since Timothy will either be in BC or MOS school, it's okay, I'll make the best of it with some amigas. 

Be lovely,

Stephanie

Music to my ears

My Oh My....

I've been completely obsessed with this song, Safe and sound by Taylor Swift. I absolutely love it. how about you?  So here it is. Enjoy.  

Be lovely,

Stephanie

Some new things

So what's up for today ?

I've been going nuts looking at my laundry basket get bigger and fuller. School and work dominate my life, so when I get home I don't have time to clean in detail, but today is completely committed to just that, cleaning and putting away all my clothes. Oh! Yesterday I went shopping and got this cutesy romper and crazy dramatic ring. what do you think ? 

Be lovely,

Stephanie

Finally Something!

Hi, So I am so exited, last night while finishing up a super important and dreadful essay,my phone rings at 9:18pm. No, it wasn't Timothy, it was his mom. She told me she finally got his address and wanted to give it to me. I was so happy and grateful that she remembered and even thought to tell me. She said

"I know how he thinks, I know that when he sent us the address that he was hoping that we would give it to you, so now when he gets a letter from you hell know we're letting you know as much as we know. Write him a lot so that he feels better"

That made me feel so much better. And she was right, knowing him, he was definitely stressing if I would get the address too. Im also excited because I also got to talk to her about the flights and going to NC, Parris Island to go to his graduation! Super excited for that. Cant wait to fly back home to NY with him. It is far away but at least now I get to write to him, and hear from him. I feel that the time is going to go by faster now. Let's hope ! So Ive already been writing him letters and when I woke up this morning I immediately went straight for the post office, gave them in and bought stamps.

From experience, do the letters really help time go by faster or does it just add on to the waiting game? 

 Be even more lovely darling, 

 Stephanie

Girs will be girls

Forgive me!

 I'm blogging up a storm but I finally have the time to so here it is. FRIENDS are honestly the best, and if you have amazing friends like I do then they'll be there for you when you truly need them no matter what. The weekend Timothy left, I immediately went and had a well needed sleepover with a friend that I knew for as long as I knew Timothy. She's amazing, meet Kathy. Talking to someone, anyone about how I was feeling really helped and made me see things in perspective. It's amazing when you can see things from someones else's point of view, it helped me feel more grounded instead of feeling like the emotional wreck that I was seriously on the verge of becoming. Hey, she even got a whole lot of smiles out of me. She's probably going to kill me for putting these pictures up ! 

 WARNING: we had way too much fun with the effects on the iPad. And yes I'm wearing a Marines sweatshirt <3

Chicken littles !

Oh my, I was looking through my very old photobucket account and I came across some very old pictures. Timothy and I have been friends for like 6 years. These pictures I found were from our first few months in high school. Fun.  We look the same but definitely did a lot of growing, him especially. 

 TRY NOT TO LAUGH AT US, ITS OKAY, i laughed at us.

Just breathe

Rambling: Im still waiting for his first letter. Everything that has to do with him leaving is literally a waiting game.

 He left March 12th and so it's ONLY been 9 days (feels like forever). I know the letters come anywhere within 10-14 days, I wish I was one of those lucky ones that received it immediately, but I'm not the lucky type anyway. I'm really into "keeping busy" lately, I have to be or I'll start going mildly insane. So I've been literally knee deep in school work. I'm also kind of taking these three months of being alone and using it to better myself. I joined the gym and found a new love of excersising. He comes back June 8th and my birthday is on June 11th so I want to look pretty damn good for my 19th birthday.

 Plus all of this new healthy way of life makes me feel good. I encourage EVERYONE to start taking care of themselves too, ladies it feels awesome. Now if only I could sleep. I wonder what other marine supporters (lovely ladies commited to a marine) do to get some sleep. I write a lot to him but until I have an address I'll continue to feel like I'm writing him letters that he'll never see. 

 Dear address, please come. 

  Be lovely ,

 Stephanie

He Called!

Last night was so hard for me. It was my first night without him, without any contact, nothing. This is a huge change for me because we literally spoke all day, every day. So last night was shockingly dreadful. But, I got through it. I posted some stuff, wrote a three page (front and back) letter to him, and finally knocked out at about 3:35 am. I was exhausted and emotionally drained. The next thing I knew, I was being woken up by my phone ringing as loud as God knows what and my heart dropped. It was the weirdest number and I knew it was him. He had a calling card and called me from the airport we had a little less than 9 minutes. I'm so happy that he called me, but still its hard to just hear his voice for 9 minutes and then he goes away again and I have to prep and deal with being ale to deal with what I believe to be the permanent separate between us. YIkes. Then about 15 mutes later I get an email from him and my heart dropped yet again.

"hey my love i'm at the airport but i cant really talk so dont right back. um i miss you so much already and i want you to know that i'm never going to stop loving you. and i'll always be thinking of you, stay strong baby. for me, for us. i want an us more than anything. i dont have much time to type. i love you. our life together is so crazy, and i wouldnt change it for the world, i promise and swear i will be good to you. i love you and neeed you and im never going to mess up. thank you baby for loving me.. for waiting. for supporting me. bye baby. i'll hear from you soon. i love you   Remember stay motivated ! and please baby i need your support more than anyones, so dont forget motivate me! lol bye baby"

Things to get me by... hopefully

1. Crazy amounts of oovoo pics to look back on 

2.  Reese's and a pretty journal 

3. My silly bald headed bird 

(shes very anti-social)

4. His boot camp calendar (makes me feel like i can somewhat know what hes doing and what he's going through)

5. Letters pre- written to me by him, one for every every two days that he's gone. Plus a book he wrote on our story, from our young middle school days to now  (about 6 years). Oh and Video diaries! But, i cant read every letter at once nor see all the videos at once, its assigned day by day and i promised not to peek. Torture. 

Last note:

It's hard, doing all of this, being a part of this, and dealing with this. It's so hard. But i love him. He's my best friend, and It's hard. This is my first night without talking to him. Day one and I'm already feeling the void. Imagine the rest of the days to come... I hope i have the strength to keep on going with this. It honestly is the most extreme version of the waiting game that i could ever possibly imagine. I think I'll start writing my first letter to him now, I'm sure he's doing the same. If i feel this way, imagine how he must feel. I hope he's okay. 

Have a lovely night, 

Stephanie

Hello love

This is me 

I never thought that id be one of "those girls"that would have someone...be with someone in the military. Absolutely no one in my family has ever joined the military, so its basically unknown territory to me. I could never understand how some girls could have the strength and emotional stability (for the record- I have NONE, emotional stability that is) to be able to wait for that special someone to come home. Funny thing is, I'm majoring in psychology you'd think i would be able to have a grasp on m emotions to some extent, well i don't. Go Figure. 

This is him

Isn't he handsome?

For starters he's the sweetest guy out there. Timothy is one of those easy going artistic thin and fit guys that look best with out of control facial hair, and i love it! We started as best friends back in middle school (6th grade to be exact) and who would have thought that in college we would reconnect as much more? Not me. But so glad we did. 

Long story short: He enlisted in the marines before we even started talking again. We reconnected suddenly and started talking and like expected, became inseparable. He (out of impulse and puppy love) decided to not leave on his original day to go to boot camp (December) and even wanted to abandon the idea and end his contract before even going. We later spoke about it and decided it was best for him to go. So on Sunday, March 11, 2012 he finally left to boot camp. It's really tough, not only do i feel like I missing my boyfriend, but my best friend as well. But it's what he wanted to do, so I'll be there every step of the way. June 8th is when he'll be back and even though its 88 days away, I still like to think that it's not that far away.